Sunday, November 28, 2010

Hello my unseen audience of readers whom of which I miss dearly,

I´m sitting in an internet café currently listening to classic Spanish music with a lot of feeling and cheesiness infused into it, and I have to say, I´m glad America has the music it does. Anyways, to answer the family questions this week, I have no idea if I´m going to be able to celebrate Thanksgiving, I kind of forgot about it. I would think not because they don´t have it here in Central America, and half the missionaries are latinos so… I don´t know I´ll let you know. I would think not. Speaking of Latino missionaries, Mom was wondering where Elder Alberto is from, he is from San Salvador in El Salvador, and I think he is pretty rich because he had a car (extremely rare for a teenager in Central America, not necesarily because they are more por, but because cars are more expensive here) and his family sends him a huge package every change. Also my spanish… Always I feel as if it isn´t sufficient, which I think will last till the end of my mission (wow I need to lighten up huh?) but I really feel blessed with the language. I can converse normally with pretty much anyone, it just depends on the context and if I know the vocabulary for that subject. Like if they start talking about their job as a mechanic and start using mechanic words I´m probably going to struggle until they explain the verbs and objects and what not haha. I have a long way to go, but I really feel like I have had a lot of help in the way of spanish. A lot of kids didn´t do anything in the MTC and CCM and they are really regretting now because they are basically learning all of spanish without a knowledge of the grammar rules. I feel bad for them, because a lot of kids are really struggling. Also another note, I´m officially overwhelmed with letters, which I´m very grateful for, so please keep writing! But don´t be too mad if it takes me awhile to respond. Could someome send me the Walton´s address?

Anyways this week was another result of the ups and downs of a mission. We had so many investigators committed to church this week, including Carlos Dany and Mabele, and Jose Rivas. We worked harder than we ever have before to make sure that every one of them and more could attend this week. We had about ten by the time Saturday morning came around. Within 24 hours, every single one fell. We had members call them, oass by their house to pick them up, we passed by a lot of their houses, but despite all of our efforts every single one fell through. It was pretty rough sitting there and feeling like I had done something wrong.

During the sacrament though, I had a reassuring feeling that no matter what we do, we can not change the fact that people have their free will. Of course we need to look at what we did and what we could do differently, but that moment told me that we need to do everything we can and after that it is between them and the Lord. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed with the things we need and are supposed to be doing as missionaries. Working with the ward, finding through our own efforts, doing service, finding friends for investigators, planning activities, and the list goes on. I get hard on myself because I tend to blame myself, but what I´m trying to do is to look at what I´m doing right as well as what I´m doing wrong. Missionary work is hard, no one has ever said that it is easy, and of course I´m learning that haha. I´m learning a lot about myself out here and it´s a real growing experience, I just hope that all my efforts will result in a few people having a complete change of heart and taking this gospel into their lives and becoming completely different people. If after two years I can look back and see that, I will be happy. It´s hard work, but it´s rewarding and I´m enjoying the ups and learning from the downs. I miss you all and love you a lot. I hope you don´t forget this Young chap here in Guatemala. Enjoy your thanksgiving break everyone!

-Ben


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